Two heads are better than one!

Habit 6: Synergize: Principles of Creative Cooperation

It AMAZES me that since I have started this blog situations have been arising in my life that proceed me writing about the next habit. For example:

Habit 1 : Be Proactive - I felt the need to start this blog.
Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind - This blog came just before New Years at a time of year when I stop and take stock in what I want to accomplish in the upcoming year.
Habit 3: Put First Things First - The week before this blog I did some soul searching about what was important in my life, then went to write the blog...wow...1st things 1st.
Habit 4: Think Win-Win - Around this time life asked me some challenging questions regarding dealing with new relationships as well as old ones...then on Martin Luther King Day, when most of North America is thinking about MLK's visions of peaceful coexistence, blamo Think Win/Win.
Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood - Then last week when I was coming to a head about not being understood... Habit #5 was there to be written about.

LOL...it's even happening right now. I just got a Blackberry Message asking me if I need help with my driveway shoveling, and a little while ago I read an article about getting others to participate in my social media... The idea of synergy has been in my head for the last few days! To be completely honest, as I sat down to write this blog today, I had forgotten what this habit was about, and there it was, the very idea that had been floating around in my brain for the last few days!

Let's get a little help from Stephen himself to tell the story of Habit 6.
(This excerpt is from https://www.stephencovey.com/)

"Habit 6: Synergize - To put it simply, synergy means "two heads are better than one." Synergize is the habit of creative cooperation. It is teamwork, open-mindedness, and the adventure of finding new solutions to old problems. But it doesn't just happen on its own. It's a process, and through that process, people bring all their personal experience and expertise to the table. Together, they can produce far better results that they could individually. Synergy lets us discover jointly things we are much less likely to discover by ourselves. It is the idea that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. One plus one equals three, or six, or sixty--you name it.

When people begin to interact together genuinely, and they're open to each other's influence, they begin to gain new insight. The capability of inventing new approaches is increased exponentially because of differences.

Valuing differences is what really drives synergy. Do you truly value the mental, emotional, and psychological differences among people? Or do you wish everyone would just agree with you so you could all get along? Many people mistake uniformity for unity; sameness for oneness. One word--boring! Differences should be seen as strengths, not weaknesses. They add zest to life."

In the spirit of Synergy I am cordially inviting your questions and comments!! As we are nearing the end of the 7 habits I will require new topics to discuss. PLEASE let me know what's on your mind!

ALSO....

Feel free to  @ProAdventurer

As well on my Facebook fanpage Adventures with Johnny O.

Thanks,
Johnny O.

P.s. - This link has nothing to do with Synergy... It's just a F*#kin' cool song I heard today!!

DO NOT READ THIS BLOG...and if you do, don't understand it!!!

As I was pondering what to do for my next blog(this one) the other night I was going over some things in my head. I had a few ideas about February being the shortest month, Groundhogs Day, even one about religious intolerance. As I thought the ideas over I kept coming back to something a friend of mine had said to me earlier in the week. Their comment was that many times my communications, usually emails, are complicated, hard to understand, and/or not simple enough. This troubled me because when communicating with people I make a special effort to be as concise as possible. Using lists and bullet points, drawing on tools that I have learned from researching about communications, marketing, psychology etc. One thing I have learned over my life is that ultimately the question that works best here is not if this statement is true or not. Rather, why would this person make the effort to mention this to me, and also is it something worth changing?

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood - Principles of Mutual Understanding

Take a moment and read the following link:
https://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits-habit5.php

Good.... Now that you have read it. Please take a minute and think about it and try to understand where he is coming from. What was the result? The bottom line is that most people hear what others have to say and rarely listen, or in the case of email, see/read and rarely comprehend.

Now lets go back to my situation at the top. In this particular case my friend was addressing a particular problem I have been having where people haven't been reading "important" emails that I had been sending out that involve their future. Why would he make the comment? He was trying to help. Thanks!! Everybody could use some help. Drawing on his life experiences and giving me the best advice he knew to give.  Will I bother to change my email style... probably not and if I do it will only be slightly. Why? because the real question I was asking for help with was not how to convey the information better, instead it was how to make people more interested. See... he listened, and did not understand!

The 5th Habit, gave me the advice I was looking for.  I don't understand what they want...It's that simple!!
Even though I had taken the time to hear them out in the past. I had not listened to what they where saying. The comforting part from the 5th habit, is that I am not alone. Everybody does it. Even highly effective people from time to time forget to listen first.

How about a few examples of where listening 1st works:

1. Surveys - Companies use surveys all the time to find out out what people want before they provide them with goods or services.
2. Instruction Manuals - Understanding the instructions before you use an item...despite what many people think, always works best(As long as they are in a language you understand).
3. Waitress/Waiter - Imagine if your server came and told you what you wanted. 1st they listen, then take the order. Here is a little tip(no pun intended)... It has been statistically proven that Wait staff that repeat the order back to the customers, showing the customer they heard and understood them, get bigger tips than those that solely take the order. 

The irony here is that most of you people have read this blog and won`t take the time to understand it ;-)

Best of luck,
Johnny O.

P.s. - One thing I don't understand is...how do I get more comments on these blogs!?!?!
P.s.s. - What's so funny about peace, love, and UNDERSTANDING!?!

________________________________

Feel free to follow me on Instagram @JMOproadventurer

As well on my recently updated website https://johnmolivero.com/

Adventurers are the kind of people who should have the things they want....

otherwise they wouldn't be blessed with wanting them!!!(Mike Dooley's Notes from the Universe http://www.tut.com/resources/notes/)

Happy Monday to you all and thanks for reading this blog :-) Ever stopped to think why most people hate and sometimes fear Mondays? If you are one of the lucky ones, who LOVES Mondays, ever stop to think about why that is?

Here is my guess for the haters. The things you want in life, do not match up with the things you believe.  For example. Let's say you have always wanted to be a professional musician. You LOVE to play your instrument, when you are not playing your instrument you are thinking about playing it, or doing something that involves the betterment of your profession....oh wait, that's what professional musicians do, the ones who really do what they love!

Good chance your mind is occupied with thoughts of where to get your next Tim Horton's or Starbucks, who won the big game over the weekend, where did that asshole who just cut you off get their drivers license, or for the ladies, will that pair of shoes you saw in the mall on Saturday still be there on pay day? Does that sound more like it?

Again, to quote Mike Dooley's Notes from the universe, "How much time do you spend thinking big. I mean REALLY REALLY BIG!! Good, very good, because that's exactly how much of it you are going to get!"

Please note the sarcasm!!!

In the last blog we discussed WIN/WIN situations. Does this sounds like a win win to you? You go to work day in day out, you get payed, you go home, watch tv, go to bed....wake up and hate Mondays!!

More than likely there is a fair amount of blame that goes along with that situation. My job sucks because my boss is a bitch and my coworkers are tools, or I can't afford those shoes because I don't get paid enough, or FML because my girlfriend thinks I am fat.

I am gonna stop here and take a moment to tell you that there is nobody to blame except yourself!!!! Let me repeat it. THERE IS NOBODY TO BLAME EXCEPT YOURSELF!!!!

You have created a life for yourself that is not win/win and guess what...you are the loser 1st and foremost. The worst part is that you are not the only loser, you are creating a lose/lose situation for every one you know in the long run.

Let's revisit 3 principles of the win/win situation:

• Integrity: sticking with your true feelings, values, and commitments
• Maturity: expressing your ideas and feelings with courage and consideration for the ideas and feelings of others
• Abundance Mentality: believing there is plenty for everyone

If you trust what I am telling you here, you can look back on those 3 principles and see why you have arrived at this point in your life and are not fulfilled. That is why you are hating Monday's.

If there is something you don't like in your life you have a breakdown in one of these three areas. The good news is that there is hope. You made this mess, and you are the one who can fix it(actually the only one).

Let's see if the 7 habits can guide us:

• Habit 1 - Be proactive - Recognize that you are unsatisfied with your life.
• Habit 2 - Think with the end in mind - Figure out how you would like your life to be.
• Habit 3 - Put 1st things 1st -organize the things in your life in order of importance!
• Habit 4 - Think Win/Win - Integrity: Be honest with yourself, Maturity: be honest with others, Abundance Mentality: Trust yourself and others!!

OK...so don't go crying in your corn flakes just yet, or on the other hand, fire all half cocked to change your world.  Have a look back at some of my previous blogs. See if any of the techniques or videos will be helpful. Then if you don't like the opportunities ahead of you, proceed to cry in your corn flakes ;-)

All the best,
Johnny O.

P.s. - Here is a little tune to get your day going:


_____________________________________

Feel free to  @ProAdventurer

As well on my Facebook fanpage Adventures with Johnny O.

You can kill the dreamer and still not kill the dream

It's funny how life throws you a situation to help you learn the lesson you WANT to learn in life. It's even funnier that you may not have even realized you wanted to learn them...lol!!

That's right... I said it. I want to learn these lessons too. I'm no guru, I just happen to have read this book and want to share the principles because I believe in them. There is a great quote my father always says that can describe this best.

"In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king." So with my good eye I am going to press on and talk about :

Habit 4 - Think Win/Win - Principles of Mutual Benefit

On this Martin Luther King Day I think it very fitting to discuss the topic of Thinking Win Win. Read here what Stephen R. Covey describes in Habit 4: (From https://www.stephencovey.com/)

"Habit 4: Think Win-Win
Think Win-Win isn't about being nice, nor is it a quick-fix technique. It is a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration. Most of us learn to base our self-worth on comparisons and competition. We think about succeeding in terms of someone else failing--that is, if I win, you lose; or if you win, I lose. Life becomes a zero-sum game. There is only so much pie to go around, and if you get a big piece, there is less for me; it's not fair, and I'm going to make sure you don't get anymore. We all play the game, but how much fun is it really?

Win-win sees life as a cooperative arena, not a competitive one. Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all human interactions. Win-win means agreements or solutions are mutually beneficial and satisfying. We both get to eat the pie, and it tastes pretty darn good!

A person or organization that approaches conflicts with a win-win attitude possesses three vital character traits:

1. Integrity: sticking with your true feelings, values, and commitments
2. Maturity: expressing your ideas and feelings with courage and consideration for the ideas and feelings of others
3. Abundance Mentality: believing there is plenty for everyone

Many people think in terms of either/or: either you're nice or you're tough. Win-win requires that you be both. It is a balancing act between courage and consideration. To go for win-win, you not only have to be empathic, but you also have to be confident. You not only have to be considerate and sensitive, you also have to be brave. To do that--to achieve that balance between courage and consideration--is the essence of real maturity and is fundamental to win-win." 

Dr. Martin Luther King understood this principle in life. Actually I believe he lived it and lived all 7 of the habits.

Please take a minute to check out the video on this link: http://tinyurl.com/4auqbc3

How can you use win win thinking to make your adventure life more enjoyable? Let me count the ways:

1. When everybody wins there are no losers
2. When everybody wins you enjoy your life more
3. When everybody wins you are free at last.

Free at last to focus on what is important. Free to enjoy this very moment and every one to follow. Free to know that life is meant to be easy and that there is enough fruit on the tree for everyone!

Like I said before I am not a guru, and I don't have all your answers. You do! The next time a conflict arises stop for a moment and insist that nobody has to compromise, insist that everybody wins! At first it isn't easy, that's for sure. I promise you that the more you make an effort to find the win win in every situation it will indeed get easier as you move forward enjoying your life more!

Thanks,
John O.

 P.s. - There will be no p.s.'s today ;-)

______________________________________

Feel free to  @ProAdventurer

As well on my Facebook fanpage Adventures with Johnny O.

The surface interval of your life!

In scuba diving we have what is called a "Surface Interval". Essentially it is a time between dives that you let your body do it's thing and process some of the gasses that built up in your system during the 1st dive. The surface interval can be a great time during your dive day.

You can :

• reminisce with your buddies about the dive you just did
• relax
• enjoy some good food
• plan for the next dive
• many many more

All the while your body is doing it's best getting rid of the gases. If you noticed I said "CAN". Just like everything else in life you get out of it what you put into it. So, if during this surface interval you stress about the next dive, do strenuous activities, and not relax, you run the risk of not letting your body do it's job effectively and to it's greatest potential.

The surface interval of your life!

Stop now, take this story and super-impose it over your life. Every day, week, month, year, etc we go, go, go. We inadvertantly take time off, weekends, vacations, holidays. Do we really take the time to let our body do it's best?

I just spoke with a lovely young lady, lets call her Maybelle. Maybelle is hard at her goal setting for 2011. Constantly complaining that she can't afford to go the spa. She had seen my facebook posts supporting the Ocean Quest Spa(http://tinyurl.com/36nubvn) and my recent posts about their new fan page(http://tinyurl.com/3xqtoqj). Please note that by her own admission the prices at the OQ Spa are VERY reasonable. Hmmm... this is starting to sound like a shameless plug. Let me get back on track...

What we came up with was that Maybelle's rest and relaxation time had not been built into her goal setting plan. Here is what we discussed:

• Habit 1 - Be proactive - Decide to have more R&R in your life.
• Habit 2 - Think with the end in mind - Figure out what your R&R goals are.
• Habit 3 - Put 1st things 1st - For this one I recommended for Maybelle to write out a list of 5 things that would help her relax and enjoy life more. Then I asked her to write 5 things she didn't like to do. Then I asked her to figure out a way to swap the two. Remove the 5 things she does't like to make room for the 5 things she does(For divers... this would be called the "Nitrox of life"... Bad joke I know ;-).

Once that was all done I left her to mull those over for the day. Maybelle is a very smart woman, I am sure she will come back with all sorts of ways to to put the surface interval back into her life.

Add a surface interval to your life!! Just say no, stop, drop, and role,  & enjoy your life at all costs!!

WAIT....Isn't it friday? Weekends are a great time for R&R.... Isn't that what they were invented for? ENJOY ENJOY ENJOY!!

All the best,
Johnny O.

P.s. - I found this awesome song on youtube today that I thought Maybelle would enjoy. I hope you enjoy it too!


P.s.s. - What are your 5 R&R goals...Please let me know in the comment section, because maybe there is one I can use for my own R&R list :-)

P.s.s.s - Don't forget to sign up for my facebook fanpage. http://tinyurl.com/2v8dez9 Thanks in advance!!!!!!!!!

__________________________________

Feel free to  @ProAdventurer

As well on my Facebook fanpage Adventures with Johnny O.

Just say no...or was that stop drop and role?

Habit 3: Put First Things First -  Principles of Integrity & Execution

OK, it's 2011, undoubtedly you have made some New Years Resolutions. Mine is to be more appreciative. In that spirit...thanks for reading this blog! What's yours? Let me know in the comments section.

Hopefully from reading the previous blogs you have figured out what your goals are. Now it is time to put them in order. I'll let Stephen R. Covey explain the 3rd habit... why not go to the master? Here is his explanation from https://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits-habit3.php


Habit 3: Put First Things First To live a more balanced existence, you have to recognize that not doing everything that comes along is okay. There's no need to overextend yourself. All it takes is realizing that it's all right to say no when necessary and then focus on your highest priorities.

Habit 1 says, "You're in charge. You're the creator." Being proactive is about choice. Habit 2 is the first, or mental, creation. Beginning with the End in Mind is about vision. Habit 3 is the second creation, the physical creation. This habit is where Habits 1 and 2 come together. It happens day in and day out, moment-by-moment. It deals with many of the questions addressed in the field of time management. But that's not all it's about. Habit 3 is about life management as well--your purpose, values, roles, and priorities. What are "first things?" First things are those things you, personally, find of most worth. If you put first things first, you are organizing and managing time and events according to the personal priorities you established in Habit 2.

Now lets here from another master! Steve Vai who is undoubtedly the BEST guitarist of all time and  my personal hero, talks about what to focus on in your life. 

Notice any similarities between Steve's advice and Stephen's? Yeah I thought so!

One of the things I have learned in my life is that sometimes the "Big Picture" that Steve spoke of can be very overwhelming. I am going to share one trick that I have learned that cuts through all that.

Just say no....It is sooooooo much easier to stop doing things than it is to start doing things. By now if you have been keeping up with the blogs and the habits, you know all the things that you do want to do, that you are good at, that you are genetically encoded for. Now figure those things that you are not good at, that you are you are not genetically encoded for, and that you don't want to do.

NOW STOP DOING THEM!!

Start with, or should I say stop first with the ones that cause you the biggest problems in your life. Why bang your head against the wall doing things you didn't want to do in the 1st place when you could be out doing the things you LOVE to do?

It's that simple. Enjoy your life at all cost!

All the best,
Johnny O.

P.s. - Here is a tune that I thought of while writing this blog. Seemed kind of appropriate. Enjoy!



_______________________________________

Feel free to follow me on Instagram @JMOproadventurer

As well on my recently updated website https://johnmolivero.com/

Be involved in 2011

Hey Gang,

Going diving in a few minutes and wanted to take a moment to share this thought....

Many people say to me "how can you can you afford to do all the things you do?" or "It must be nice to be able to afford all that gear?"

Well to be honest with you I can't!! If it weren't for the help of the people around me none of this would ever happen. First I would like to start the new year off by saying thank you to all the people who have helped me get to where I am today. Second here are a few tips from my life experience to help you get the most out of your adventures:

1 - Get involved - If there is an adventure activity that you wish to take part in, join a club, make some friends who do that activity, get out there and start doing it.
2 - Support your local - After being a dive shop manager for close to 5 years, I can tell you that this is VERY important. The people at your local are keyed into the pulse of what is going on. They know who's going where, when, and why!! They are the professionals, and usually the BEST in your area. Treat them with the respect that they deserve and you will be amazed at the results. Get involved with your local.
3 - See the forest for the trees - In any activity, business, family whatever, there can be a LOT of BS. Don't get caught up in it. Figure out the truth for yourself. Be smart and be educated. Know when you are getting a good deal, know when you are being fed a load of bull, and vice versa. More importantly, KNOW when you are the one delivering the BS.
4 - Be thankful... This morning a Facebook friend was sad that only 4 people had wished him Happy New Year on FB. I reminded him that there are some people that did not recieve any well wishing. That he was lucky to have 4!
5 - Be excuse free - Let's say that you were planning to go with people on an adventure.... let's say diving, and at the last minute you back out because you realize you have no groceries and all the grocery stores will be closed by the time you are finished. Poor excuse. Do I have to make a list of the MANY ways this could be resolved or avoided? I didn't think so :-)

Anyway time is running short for this today.... Happy New Year!!
Johnny O.

P.s. - Next blog will be about Habit #3 I promise.
P.s.s. - Remember there is no such thing as cold weather conditions. Only poor equipment and poor planning. Start planning!

______________________________

Feel free to  @ProAdventurer

As well on my Facebook fanpage Adventures with Johnny O.