DO NOT READ THIS BLOG...and if you do, don't understand it!!!

As I was pondering what to do for my next blog(this one) the other night I was going over some things in my head. I had a few ideas about February being the shortest month, Groundhogs Day, even one about religious intolerance. As I thought the ideas over I kept coming back to something a friend of mine had said to me earlier in the week. Their comment was that many times my communications, usually emails, are complicated, hard to understand, and/or not simple enough. This troubled me because when communicating with people I make a special effort to be as concise as possible. Using lists and bullet points, drawing on tools that I have learned from researching about communications, marketing, psychology etc. One thing I have learned over my life is that ultimately the question that works best here is not if this statement is true or not. Rather, why would this person make the effort to mention this to me, and also is it something worth changing?

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood - Principles of Mutual Understanding

Take a moment and read the following link:
https://www.stephencovey.com/7habits/7habits-habit5.php

Good.... Now that you have read it. Please take a minute and think about it and try to understand where he is coming from. What was the result? The bottom line is that most people hear what others have to say and rarely listen, or in the case of email, see/read and rarely comprehend.

Now lets go back to my situation at the top. In this particular case my friend was addressing a particular problem I have been having where people haven't been reading "important" emails that I had been sending out that involve their future. Why would he make the comment? He was trying to help. Thanks!! Everybody could use some help. Drawing on his life experiences and giving me the best advice he knew to give.  Will I bother to change my email style... probably not and if I do it will only be slightly. Why? because the real question I was asking for help with was not how to convey the information better, instead it was how to make people more interested. See... he listened, and did not understand!

The 5th Habit, gave me the advice I was looking for.  I don't understand what they want...It's that simple!!
Even though I had taken the time to hear them out in the past. I had not listened to what they where saying. The comforting part from the 5th habit, is that I am not alone. Everybody does it. Even highly effective people from time to time forget to listen first.

How about a few examples of where listening 1st works:

1. Surveys - Companies use surveys all the time to find out out what people want before they provide them with goods or services.
2. Instruction Manuals - Understanding the instructions before you use an item...despite what many people think, always works best(As long as they are in a language you understand).
3. Waitress/Waiter - Imagine if your server came and told you what you wanted. 1st they listen, then take the order. Here is a little tip(no pun intended)... It has been statistically proven that Wait staff that repeat the order back to the customers, showing the customer they heard and understood them, get bigger tips than those that solely take the order. 

The irony here is that most of you people have read this blog and won`t take the time to understand it ;-)

Best of luck,
Johnny O.

P.s. - One thing I don't understand is...how do I get more comments on these blogs!?!?!
P.s.s. - What's so funny about peace, love, and UNDERSTANDING!?!

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